Friday, January 18, 2008

The Canara Bank Makeover


The 'Together We Can' hoardings did catch my eye somehow despite the blinkers on the road while the mind would be devotedly loitering a fictitious, yet realistic place. Like Malgudi? Maybe. The ads were unconventional and fresh (talk of vegetables, cricket fielding, a cute couple and banking all bundled and nicely spun in a less than a minute Ad!).
The more eloborate new tag- ' We change for the ones we love' is absolutely appealing, alright. Relating it on our personal planes it's almost a very very corny, unnecessary cliche. The "Anything for you, baby", "Guess what, I did this just for you" and such other moronic lines, even I use, many times, if not all the times. And at some vastly extraordinary times (that happens once in say seventy nine days,I mean, times like now) I would be ruthlessly sane and marginally objectivist and would go on this "why in the blazes should I do something just for another"- be it my best buddy or my dearest aunty. Ofcourse, am not ridiculous enough to encourage the hopeless drug addicts to trample all the advice their loved ones just because they love to dope. But the "I'll wear that orange kurti every alternate day because it's your favorite"-types is downright pathetic. The example is a very trivial one, but many a little drop like this will enthusiastically drain the ocean of You, Your Soul. And I just send this "Anything for you, baby" sms. Haha, that was just for some punch, am not that silly to divulge it even if I did.

This, and Youthcurry's recent blog triggered me to write this. I had been musing breezily about this when I first saw the hoardings. It sprung alive, now.

"I love God, my family, my friends, red wine, fireworks, going for a long, sweaty run, laughing until no sound comes out and taking my time" - Kirsten Richard, when she's not Lance Armstrong's, anymore, on Oprah Winfrey Show.

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,1192564,00.html

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Today's Very Proper Improper Fraction(?): 22/3





The title is self-explanatory. Doesnt even need this cricinfo screen shot. I came from office at 8 am today. Dead, bored and sleepy. Was staring at Channel number 14 (that's where Star Cricket is telecast (not so morally) at not so important times) for some freak co-incidence to happen. Cursing the Conditional Access System has become part of my chores, so to say. My PC had cricinfo, cricketnext and some other three-four cricket sites- all but one minimized. My eyes and consequently my whole self shuttled madly between gazing at the PC and Channel 14. 330 / 10 - the Lords smiled and all that (Is this cliched now too?) The shuttles stopped and I comfortably parked in one lucky corner of one particular sofa in a very specific posture (After fourteen years of analysis, Indians do marginally less worse when am positioned so. So much for virtually and wastefully strategising? Oh, I cant help it. Many cant, either.
It's lunch, Harsha and Shaz are suavely yelling (Blame the volume, Cricket takes precedence even when am blogging)- 22/3. Am wide awake and thoroughly excited and there's this ear-to-ear-grin pasted permanently, temporarily. Such is the fanaticism and the singular dedication to the sport. Five overs of action and if in India's favour- we are beyond ourselves. Some jump all around, some stay at one corner savouring the moments, some sms the world about this (like they are the only ones watching),some blog(haha). Different expressions, same emotion.
Ok, the the play's about to resume, I need to strategically position myself in that same corner.

PS: Indians might even lose the game comprehensively, It's this moment that matters- I wont mince words.








Sunday, January 13, 2008

Daldized?



So this guy called me "Dalda" (Yes, that was an endearment. And yes, all my friends are atrociously crazy). Of course, he never thought about the "dalda"-nick (he's almost, always retarded :D) but instantly I connected with the name. Ask me why. People who know me too well for too long a time (the latter is a definite criterion) would get this, too. Melting into other people's(who make my 'Dalda's' world/ made its(?) 'then' world) life,Dalda adds that extra bit of taste, that extra bit of ease when not in excess such that it doesnt override what's not to be. And the people did, after a while realise that Dalda was all of ephemeral bliss. Through precedents. But they forgot that- You dont realise that when you're in the Dalda-Zone. But then one day, there were health disorders (disorder of something else's health? Affirmative.) Then they realised. Slipped into the Daldized Precedent Bandwagon. Of course, they made a better world for their good and even Dalda's good (even the occasional deepest pangs of guilt become less deeper by the consolation that it's all bright and beautiful in that Daldized world which I mentioned a little earlier.)
Some things never change.
Oh they can.
PS: Please do not mind if its kind of obscure. Or too obvious :)

Sunday, January 06, 2008

Those I want to do. And those I havent done.


1) Ride on a super sopper. At MCG. Am applying for the groundsman's post out there. Ok, I am not that insane, yet.
2) Trek for long, and high, despite my physical limitations (Being round doesnt necessarily do the 'wheels-easing-effect'), reach the peak and raise my hands above my head. I should touch the sky. Well, atleast seemingly. Figuratively, I better.
3) Meet Rehab. She's a transitive friend, her writings are as beautiful as her soul (and this, is a complement for her soul!), someone who I see a lot or most of myself in, just that she's livelier, more delightful, brilliant and perfectly knows what she's upto (I score an as-round-as-me zero here). Did I say I see most of me in her? Oh, I still do.
4) Bungee Jump. Must-do before am stuffed into the ground or before I glide into senility. Gravity is the most charming thing. Who doesnt fall for it?
5) Ride on a camel across the desert wearing those typical Rajasthani attires and accessories. And then, there should be a sand storm. Atleast, I should dream of this, one night.
6) Work for what I want, despite me. Yes, am my biggest and the only odd. The superficial odds are my derivatives. Now, what do I want? I'll figure that out.
7) Watch India Vs Australia, 1998 in Sharjah, LIVE. To witness the Sachin Masterclass, the panache and quality of His cricket. Time Travel is fiction, unfortunately. And fortunately.
8) Capture the morning dew doing an untrained ballet on the lotus leaf. The colourless drop becomes nature's emerald. I think it should be beautiful.
9) Step out of myself and look at what I do for a while. This was suggested by a co-blogger to get out of reality's mundanity. But it doesnt seem possible. It's creepy, even. Very intriguingly interesting though.
10) Blow bubbles by an idyllic riverside and trace the bubble till it reduces to nothingness. And trace the next.
Ah, a round figure. But there are many many more. I'll blog them in such round installments.

Friday, January 04, 2008

Today's Number: 154*

And today was even better. Somehow, a ton from the master himself pleases me more than anything else or anyone else's. Call it blind worship or unabashed bias- I do not know. And I do not know if there are many of my genre? Whatever be it, All hail the Master. I caught his interview on CNN IBN or some channel, prior to the Aussie tour. The child-like innocence that dances with grace on his countenence, the all teeth-out-smiles stuck almost always, the innate and spontaneous humility and the passion in his voice- all this strikes and stuns me, many-many-folds than what his glorious straight drives or his inimitable paddle sweeps do. His greatest hallmark is his simplicity, the just-another-brick exterior with so much character, will and spunk well concealed. He never ceases to floor me. And 'the world' can substitue 'me'.

PS: There used to be some eerie connection between Sachin's well being on the cricket grounds and my academic well being when at school. More, later on some random sunday.

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Ok, Nobody needs to buy me time!


New Dawn, Each Day- More Metaphorical than Literal

More than my way of life, my talks, unbelievably so, have become monotonous. One day, it's bright crimson and that would be friday, late evening types. The rest of the days- different grey/blue shades. Each day, different layers but same colours. So much for difference? First up, I hardly talk at my work place which beats me, even, considering the titles I have been graciously bestowed upon by my folks who know me - "Instant Friend Maker", "Non Stop Yapper" and many more like these. Somehow, the buddy-clique at work place is yet to click. Anyway, coming to monotony and my drab talking- If at all I catch someone online and jab over phone to another (which, has become super rare- NO eye popping!), I go on this major cribbing mode, complain about work, the sadness of it and about the complete lack of time to do all the stuff (mostly useless, but still) I used to and absolutely loved to do. "Somebody buy me time!" had become my everyday appeal to whoever I spoke to.
But it just takes thirty seconds or maybe just a moment to shift the paradigm. I started reading some obscure novel 'Candyfloss Martyrs' I had picked from British Council. These lines struck me like some bullet, hard. And it's implanted inside something sitting pretty (sometimes not so pretty) in my cranium. I died. Ofcourse, reborn with one more thought appended. :)

"Speed and Distance and time- Millar had none and needed all three to elude the dilemma; the first as a means of achieving the second, the last lying beyond the influence."

Now this may seem totally trivial to some, and very profound to some others. And my inner voice yelled: "Why didnt I realise this before?"
This can be positively extrapolated to all the zillion (only that much?) complaints we lodge on those which lie beyond our influence. Or am I the only senseless moron who does that?

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

An empty conversation makes my day :P

This 'bum' Indu was my first best friend way back in 1992. We had the same earrings. We used to study together for the PCM Scholarship Exams at her place. And, gorge on Samosas. We used to play super silly games back then. Like- I was the 'Plant', Indu was 'Soil Conservation' and another bum of our kind was 'Soil Erosion'. Ok, I think it requires some intellectual ability to play such games? And yes,she used to be all furious if I talked to someone else, her apart :. Then we fought. Then we were bench mates. And she used to blabber some genetics crap to me (Only I used to put up with all that, I guess :D). She read The Prodigal Daughter when she was a seventh standard kid and used to urge me to call her Florentyna Rosnovski all the time. I did that after I learnt to pronounce that Floren whatever.Haha. Then we grew up? Never wondered where the other was and journeyed on.One fine day, she came home. A trrring-trrring, a bear hug and we watched chalte chalte. We again journeyed on. The occasional scraps, the rare spring of gtalk maggi/more than maggi conversations, the odd odd mail(??)- It's been one journey :) Even the nothingest of talks with this ass is something to remember. Thanks fool, for all this!

6:48 PM Indu: happy new year :)
me: heyy sweety
happy new year bum!
Indu: :)
where are you??? :)
me: how are you, where are you, what u upto?
lol
home ass
Indu: am good... am at home... :)
me: work's too sad
6:49 PM Indu: good.. :)
me: WHAT
when are u getting back????
Indu: i'll be here ffor a while..
what about this saturday-sunday?? :)
me: next weekend??
SURE!
Indu: i am going back to manipal on the 22nd..
but am going to bombay on the 11th...
me: o lovely man,, we ll hopefully meet up this weekend!!
Indu: i wanted to call u ... good i saw u online :)
me: gimme ur number??
6:50 PM Indu: yeah we must... like we really should..
ok.. i'll have amma's phone with me.. her no is ##########
me: %%%%%%%%%% is mine
Indu: home ***********
me: bum am so happy!
Indu: lol... yeah... we REALLYHAVE TO meet this time :)
6:51 PM me: i kno!! we ll rope in priyanka, its long since i met that bum too!!, the 3 will have a blast this weekend!!
6:52 PM Indu: yeah sure.. sounds really good :)
where shall we go? :)
and no telling.. "you've become fat"
me: manhattan? :P
Indu: promise?? :)
me: haha
i ll try NOt to :P
Indu: nah.. how about the ruins of maachu picchu??
me: if u dont tell me that!!
6:53 PM that sounds even better :P
ass
we ll meet up sumwhere!! Mocha???
Indu: ok.. mutual promise?? :)
he he...
me: Yo yo!
Indu: yeah mocha sounds good.. :)
so cool.. cant wait :)
6:54 PM me: have u been there ass?? whats with ur 'sounds good' ::x
mee toooo!!!
we ll make it sunday eevning!
i have got ridiculous nightshifts u see, i might sleep all saturday :D
sunday pakka!
6:55 PM if madam pinky is not all that busy!
Indu: will confirm about sunday :) but most probably i am in :)
its kutcheri season... :)
she must be really busy right
me: i kno i kno, but time 4 her bum chums she must have!! :D
6:56 PM Indu: ok "bum"
:)
lol...
how's everyone at home??
me: too many smileys!! kya hua ek guy mila kya? :P
every1s good da
hows every1, arun??
6:57 PM mum dad paati
Indu: lol.. wht the hell... i always use smileys.. :)
me: lol
Indu: i am called "the smiley girl"
:)
he he...
me: maybe am noticing them just today :P
lol
Indu: everyone's fine.. :) wish them at home as well...
me: smiley cartoon
sure, my mom was here only, she was like 'is this indu'!!!
Indu: look at the past transcripts (if any) and my mails.. if u're tht vetti in life... lol.. and u will realise!! :)
6:58 PM he he,.,. why.. anything to do with the "w" factor?? :)
me: same factor :D
i showed her ur saree pics some months back when ud sent me in trivandrum
Indu: he he... dude... i simply am not able to lose "w"
its like... "mission impossible"
:( :(
6:59 PM me: n the 'w' wasnt glaring in them, she was like my my so pretty n all that :D
welcome t my club
its really ok u know!
as long as one's healthy
look whos tellin the doc
;D
Indu: lol.. yeah th pic right.. awesome.. :) i keep staring at it sometimes... :)
but if u see me now.. ;)
lol.. my cpousin stayed at my house for half year...
7:00 PM and she also put on loads of weigth right..
so my aunt asked my mom "what rice do oyu buy?? "
he he...
me: :D people ask u folks the same qn that prabhu the actor's asked AND folks at the lakshmi house r asked :P
7:01 PM not an issue at all,, infact i kep telling myself fat's beautiful ;D
affirmations help u know?
;D
Indu: he he... please make me believe tht :)
Now.. am REALLY looking forward to meeting u.. :)
he he.. more than a few sentences before.. :)
7:02 PM me: and i do something else also.. like id tell myself when ever i see some slim sleek bums on the road, not bad i aint a loot fatter than them :P it immensely helps..
i ll teach u more of these when we meeet :D
Indu: yeah yeah... i'll bring a book and a pen ;)
7:04 PM me: lol, as long as u inscribe them into ur bird brain.. that wud really do :P
7:05 PM Indu: bird brain huh.. :)
7:06 PM me: or bird brainless? :P
Indu: more like brain birdless :)
7:07 PM me: then whats it filled with? cats dogs n mice??
Indu: nah... volcanic ash...;)
7:08 PM me: ur smileys make ur msgs so saccharine u know.. even if u say 'bloody ashole :)' ppl wouldn think u r swearing :P
Indu: he he... :)
lol.. yeah i guess.. but its a good thing :)
me: yes, am learning that today :)
lol :)
damn ist so weird!!
7:09 PM :)
lol
Indu: hey... my trade secret!!!
guys find it very weird though.,.. :)
me: who cares, its mine too, now!
obviously!
even i find it so
Indu: hmmm... logic..
me: all find the smileys-all-over weird
it takes an indu not to find them so!!
Indu: if u find it weird.. u shouldnt use it.. :)
me: no, id try, i like weird things
7:10 PM :D
Indu: u should reserve the privelege for those who find it useful.. and not so gay... ;)
and tht my friend.. is a true statement!!
me: now where are we getting to :P
Indu: idhuke.. some guy was like.. "man.. u need to chill in life... u are so serious serious "
:( :(
7:11 PM me: who?? u?? serious-serious?? despite all these smileys?? they are a pretense??
10 qn marks scare you??
;)
Indu: according to another guy.. it is a pretense...
lol.. yeah..
they scare me?? lol..
am doing mbbs dude..
7:12 PM u think i'd get scared bny 10 qn marks??????????????
me: so?
Indu: ????
its biologically not possible..
just as me losing weight is not posible :(
:)
me: :D who knows.. maybe we shud give vir chakras to mbbs dudes..?? or to those who dont get scared of 10 OR more qn marks????
7:13 PM :D
7:14 PM Indu: yeah i think so... want to sign a petition for tht?? :)
7:15 PM me: id pioneer it and win the first thing 4 myself :P
u wud, too
but that again depends on ur behavoiur!!
Indu: hmm :) share the honours?? :)
lol..
7:16 PM me: hey am publishing thsi on my blog!!
:P
n sending links to all ur pals
Indu: which?? this chat transcript??
:)
make sure u put my name on it..
me: t see how INSANE U R..
Indu: in big bold black letters :)
me: ofcourse they know that
:D
Indu: lol.. u think this is insane?? :)
7:17 PM wait and watch.. pray tht sunday comes soon :)
me: if u think its sane, n i think its sane, it has to be insane??
Indu: no.. its more simple than tht.. :)
7:18 PM i think its insane.. :) its got nothing to do with u thinknig whether its sane or insane... irrespective of whether yiou are actualkly sane or insane...
the thing is.. even if i am insane.. i can think i am sane.. and... if i am sane.. i can pretend to be insane..
7:19 PM and since this situation invilbes 2 individuals..
involves...
there are 4 possible situations...
and we cannot cater to all those four..
so lets just assume tht i am indeed insane :) and forget about the rest for the sake of convenience.. for the present moment :)
7:21 PM ok... all organs in one piece?? :)
7:23 PM ok.. i guess something hapened :(
7:27 PM me: am eating asshole!
what craploads uve typed!!
7:28 PM Indu: yeah i know :)
7:29 PM am good at this right :)

And got disconnected :X

PS:I shall definitely post a Part 2 if ever we resume this conversation :P